Alekhine once said: “Deux Fous gagnent toujours mais trois: jamais.” – Hammer Ben gives a recap below of Hammersmith’s tour to Paris, and while we may have been made the fools over the board, we won the unexpected prize of amazing friends and magical moments.
**Light Jazz and Heavy Losses: Hammers Paris Chess Trip 2024**
The Hammers’ recent excursion to Paris for their much-anticipated chess trip was a whirlwind of gastronomic escapades, musical interludes, and, of course, intense chess battles. The trip’s highlights included memorable moments of culinary competition, cultural exploration, and an arduous but enlightening chess tournament.
It all began with Matt’s misadventure involving truffle mozzarella. Blocked from indulging in this delicacy reminiscent of 14…Rf8 from Efim Bogoljubov vs Alexander Alekhine world championship match 1929 game 18, he retaliated in kind with 40.Nxe6+ the fork of the King and Rook a metaphor for withholding cheesecake from the rest of the team. This sparked a friendly but fierce food feud that weighed heavily on Hammers, leaving them somewhat depleted in spirit and energy as they headed into their Paris chess matches.
**Unreliable spirits**
The team visited Montparnesse Cemetery to discover John did not possess the innate wisdom of the other members to not make friends in a cemetery. Blessings were were requested from the spirits of Alekhine, Gainsbourg and President Chirac for good luck in the upcoming tournament.
**Light Jazz and Heavy Losses**
As the team settled in the Paris Blitz cafe, the gentle strains of light jazz provided an unexpected backdrop. The famously delicate Hammers found themselves mesmerized and slightly disoriented by music. The culmination of the previous evenings culinary conflict, light jazz music and ineffective spirits seemed to sap the vigor needed for the games ahead, ultimately contributing to a 6.5/16 loss. Despite the setback, new Hammer Jen shone brightly, securing 2 of those crucial points and proving her mettle amidst the chaos.
**Pete’s New Shirt**
To celebrate his participation, Pete went shopping and bought a rather fetching blue shirt. Well done Pete!
**Sushi and Defending John’s Honour**
The evening brought a reprieve with a spectacular sushi supper. On the way to a cocktail bar after their sushi feast, the Hammers faced an unexpected challenge. John, in his typical exuberance, inadvertently bumped into a group of local men. The atmosphere grew tense, but Gaston and Jen sprang into action with impressive swiftness. Jen’s fierce resolve and Gaston’s commanding presence quickly diffused the situation, ensuring John’s safety. Meanwhile, the rest of the group, unaccustomed to such impromptu combat, watched in awe and gratitude.
The least intelligent members of the tour ended up at karaoke, where the Hammers’ vocal talents (or lack thereof) were put on display, much to the bemusement of the Parisian locals.
The atmosphere was contemplative with philosophical questions of if we liked gasolina and if we wanted more.
**A Midnight Feast and a Hotel Cat**
The adventure continued with the group encroaching on a local’s 2:30am meal and birthday party at the hotel, catering to the nocturnal whims of the Parisians. John, in a moment of bewilderment slipped, channelled Johnny Wilkinsonlike strength and precision “accidentally” converting the hotel cat for 3 points.
**Cultural Exploration: Menagerie, Sainte-Chapelle, and Catacombs**
On the final day, Benji led an excellent tour of Menagerie du Jardin des Plantes, followed by a visit to Sainte-Chapelle. These cultural explorations were uplifting, infusing the team with the spirit of the French Revolution. They celebrated the overthrowing of the bourgeoisie with brioche lobster rolls and glacé du Grom.
The subsequent visit to the catacombs served as a poignant reminder of mortality. This somber reflection on life and death added depth to their journey, contrasting with the lighter moments of the trip. It was a fitting conclusion to their Parisian adventure, grounding them as they prepared to return home.
**Homeward Bound**
Stoically, the Hammers boarded the London-bound train, their spirits tempered by the knowledge of life’s fleeting nature. They left Paris with memories of skirmishes across the board and dining table, knowing that their experiences, though temporary , were treasured.
**Vincent’s Organizing Feats and the Swiss Connection**
Amidst the Hammers’ Parisian escapades, a special mention goes to Vincent, whose organizational efforts were nothing short of heroic. Faced with the challenge of recruiting players during a weekend brimming with other competitions, Vincent nonetheless succeeded in assembling a formidable lineup. His dedication was further underscored by his journey from Switzerland to join the team in Paris. As a token of appreciation and camaraderie, the Hammers extend an open invitation to Vincent and his Swiss compatriots for a return match in London, promising them a warm welcome and perhaps a truce in the truffle mozzarella wars.
Thank you Benji for organising a wonderful trip.
By Hammer Ben
Loved the article but shame to see that it was written by such a reprobate. I pictured Ben as a stand up, suit wearing, chess gentle man but the photo at the end has dashed my fantasies. Please ensure your next article writer wears far less metal and eyeliner.
I will continue to dream about chess but Ben will no longer feature.
Who is he???? Wow